


Let me go, Tony

by PxrkerStark



Series: Peter Parker: The human disaster [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Crying, Dead May Parker (Spider-Man), Drugged Peter Parker, Hallucinations, Hallucinogens, Mind Manipulation, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Panic Attacks, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter isn't in control, Restraints, Scared Tony Stark, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Worried Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:40:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28380321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PxrkerStark/pseuds/PxrkerStark
Summary: Tony's blood went cold as soon as he saw Peter standing on the ledge of the roof, staring down at the world beneath him. He was trembling, tears streaming down his cheeks. His hair blew softly from the wind and Tony feared that would be what would push him over that ledge.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Peter Parker: The human disaster [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2009887
Comments: 6
Kudos: 205





	Let me go, Tony

**Author's Note:**

> I hope everyone had a nice Christmas for those who celebrate. Perfect time to write this for some self-comfort. I’ve had a bad night.
> 
> Enjoy loves.

Peter yipped as he swung from building to building, shooting out his webs and attaching it to a sharp corner of a skyscraper and swinging around, letting go to free-fall before shooting another web to catch himself.

It was getting late, nearing the end of patrol as the sun lowered, casting a warm orange tint across the city. Peter perched on top of a building, smiling as the sight gave him the feeling of calmness and peace. 

Being Spider-man never got old, seeing the sunset every night, being able to help people, making new friends even if he might not see them again. It never got old. Everything was finally going well for Peter. He hasn’t been this happy in a  _ long _ time. 

When May died he believed he’d never be happy again. He tried to decline Tony’s request to adopt him, believing he was a cursed child who killed every guardian/parent he got only to be reassured by Tony that wasn’t true. Not one bit. 

Then why did everyone die? 

It took Peter forever to recover after May’s tragic car accident and Tony was there the entire time to help him. He soon realized Tony made a great father and trusted him with his life. If Peter was ever in trouble, Tony was there to catch him and get him back on his feet. 

And now as Peter sat on top of a building, watching the sun lower beneath the horizon, he smiled. 

Something caught his eye as he looked over the buildings, the sky dark now. He noticed a girl around his age standing on the edge of a building, her dress blowing softly from the breeze as she stepped closer to the ledge. 

Peter’s heart jumped at the sight. There were tears streaming down her cheeks, a look of fear on her face. Something about the sight told Peter she didn’t want to be doing what she was about to do. And Peter wouldn’t let her. 

The girl placed a foot over the ledge, holding it in the air before letting her weight fall forward. Peter’s heart raced as he dropped from his spot on the roof, swinging and snatching the girl who remained silent as she fell. She screamed in protest when Peter wrapped one arm around her, using his strength to hold her squirming body against his safely. 

“No! No, let me go!” She screamed and Peter winced at the shrill sound right in his ear.

“I’m sorry but I can’t do that.” Peter frowned as he swung them safely to the ground. The girl continued screaming and pleading, making Peter’s heart hurt. He wanted to know exactly what happened that put her in this state, what made her feel like she needed to end her short-lived life when there was so much more to do with it, she had a future. Peter wanted to fix everything for her. 

“I need to die!” She sobbed, trying to scramble away from Peter as soon as he let go of her. She got to her feet and ran out into the middle of a road in front of a truck, she would’ve been hit had Peter not shot out a web and yanked her away just in time. He winced as her knees scraped against the concrete but it was better than being hit by a car. 

When Peter realized she wouldn’t stop trying to hurt herself he brought her into an alleyway and webbed her hand to a dumpster. She tugged as hard as she could and didn’t stop even when she knew the webs wouldn’t break.

“Karen, get the police down here, tell them what happened.”

‘They’re on their way.’ Karen told him.

“Hey, can you tell me your name?” Peter asked gently, crouching down in front of her. The girl stopped struggling to look at him. He noticed her pupils were extremely dilated and she had this distant look in her eyes, something was off about this. Her eyes cleared as she looked at him, then she spoke. 

“Alyssa,” she told him, panting heavily. She paused and looked at her hand, a confused look crossing her features. “Why am I webbed to this dumpster?” she questioned, seemingly calmer. 

Peter frowned. “Do you remember what you tried to do?” he questioned. She raised a brow and shook her head. “What’s the last thing you remember?” Peter urged. She looked down at her lap thoughtfully. 

“My mom gave me some money for groceries so I went out to the store and got some stuff. On my way home I took this alley-way that is a shortcut to my neighbourhood, I remember seeing someone and… I don’t remember anything after that…” she told him, confusion lacing her voice. She suddenly started staring distantly at Peter. Peter tilted his head, waving his hand in front of her face. She blinked and that distant look was back in her eyes again. 

“I have to go.” she said, “I have to go!” she yelled, tugging at the webbing again. 

“Why? Why do you have to go?” Peter asked, his voice hard but calm. She looked at him with a crazed look. 

“I have to do it or  _ it  _ will.” she told him, a haunted look in her eyes. Sirens could be heard in the distance and Peter stood up. Her words confused him. 

_ She had to kill herself or it would do it _ . Do what? Would  _ it _ kill her itself or kill  _ itself _ if she didn't kill  _ herself _ . This was so confusing to Peter but he would figure it out. Maybe Tony would know. 

Police officers and Paramedics arrived, climbing out of their vehicles. Paramedics approached the girl and Peter warned them. 

“She’s delirious, keep her restrained until she calms down. I don’t believe she did this willingly, something happened.” Peter told the two Paramedics, they nodded and he helped them free her from his webbing. She immediately struggled but they restrained her, putting her on a gurney and strapping her down. 

“You’ll be okay, Alyssa.” Peter told her even though he knew she probably couldn’t hear him over all of the Paramedics reading out her vitals and getting her ready to be taken to a hospital. Two officers approached Peter.

“You said she tried killing herself?” the man recalled. Peter nodded. 

“I don’t believe she did it willingly. She seemed off, possibly intoxicated. She snapped out of it for a little bit and didn’t seem to remember anything except for walking through an alleyway earlier today and that's where her memory ends. Then she was out of it again and said something about having to do it or  _ it  _ will. I don’t know who or what  _ it  _ is but I’ll figure it out.” Peter told them, his happy mood dulled by the seriousness of the situation. The officers nodded, the woman writing down his words in a notepad.

“Alright. Thanks, Spider-man.” the man smiled and clapped his shoulder. Peter nodded. 

“I should get going. Have a good evening officers.” Peter called as he began walking down the alleyway. 

“You too!” they called and watched as he shot his webs and swung away. 

“Karen, call Tony.” 

‘Calling Tony Stark,’ she informed. 

_ “Hey kiddo, what’s up? Please don’t tell me you got stabbed again.”  _ Tony’s voice came through the mask. 

“Nope, didn’t get stabbed this time. Just calling to let you know I’m on my way home. This  _ crazy  _ thing happened a few minutes ago.” Peter started. 

_ “Crazier than usual?” _ Tony questioned, interested. 

“Way crazier, and confusing.” Peter hummed. 

_ “Well, ya gonna tell me?” _ Tony urged. 

Peter told Tony everything about Alyssa, about her jumping, Peter catching her, about the mysterious  _ it  _ she had talked about, the memory loss, the whole mystery of the situation. 

_ “That’s… odd. Peter, I need you to be careful. There have been reports of way more teenage suicides in the past week. The weird part is that most of the parents claimed that their kids hadn’t shown any signs of being suicidal or even depressed. Something weird is happening and I don’t want anything happening to you.”  _ Tony's voice was tight and concerned. 

“Of course, I’m almost home anyway,” Peter assured him.

_ “Alright, see you then.”  _ Tony sighed, obviously stressed. 

“See ya,” Peter said before hanging up. He continued swinging, deep in thought over what Tony had said about a boost in the number of teenage suicides. 

‘You seem troubled, Peter. Is everything okay?’ Karen asked, her voice holding concern Peter didn’t know an AI was able to do. 

“Yeah, I’m okay. Just thinking.” he reassured her as he swung into the alleyway where he left his backpack holding his clothes. 

He told Karen goodnight before stripping out of his suit and pulling his backpack off of the dumpster it was webbed to. He pulled out his Midtown School of Science sweatshirt and jeans, quickly slipping them on and stuffing his suit back into the backpack, keeping his web-shooters on. 

Peter slung his backpack over his shoulder and began making his way out of the alleyway when his spider-sense tingled and suddenly something was sprayed into his face making him cough and splutter. Peter jumped back and tripped over his own feet, hitting the ground. He blinked away blurry vision to see a distorted creature standing over him, its limbs long and fingers and teeth sharp. Its eyes gleamed red and it advanced toward him. 

Peter let out a choked scream and scrambled away, the  _ thing  _ followed. Peter was terrified, this creature was something out of his nightmares. When it spoke its words were garbled and distorted. 

“If you don’t do it, I will. And if I have to, it won’t be painless.” the contorted voice growled, showing off its sharp teeth before vanishing. Peter was left breathless, having held his breath in fear. He felt himself slowly losing it. Whatever he had been gassed with was getting to him. 

**Kill yourself.**

A voice screamed in his head. He flinched at it and shook his head, trying to get rid of the thought that seemed to be taking over his body. He felt himself slowly losing control and knew he needed to get to Tony. 

**Do it.**

Peter shook his head and got to his feet, making his way out of the alleyway and toward the tower he could see in the distance. 

**You have to, Peter.**

_ No, you don’t _

Peter kept reminding himself it was the gas, this same gas that did this to Alyssa, not actually him. He promised Tony he would be okay. 

**Tony is going to die if you stay with him, just like all of your other guardians have** **_._ **

_ That’s not true _

**You’ll be alone**

Tony won’t die. Peter would make sure of that. He was Spider-man. He would protect him. 

**Peter, Tony is already dead.**

Peter froze in the middle of the sidewalk where he was speeding toward the tower. Those words hitting him right in the gut. His heart dropped.

Tony was dead.

Somewhere in the back of Peter’s mind, he knew Tony wasn’t dead, but the gas was working and Peter was stuck in his own body as it began moving, continuing its way to the tower. Peter didn’t have control over his mind or his body anymore. He could only watch distantly as he arrived at the tower's entrance. 

Peter got into the elevator and pressed the button that took him to the rooftop. He knew what he had to do. 

Tony was dead and Peter couldn’t live in a world without his hero. 

* * *

Tony was getting anxious, Peter had called him twenty minutes ago telling him about the girl and that he would be home soon. 

What was taking so long?

Tony worried about his protege/adopted son. May had made Tony promise that he would take care of Peter when she was gone and Tony had planned to keep that promise.

“Friday, has Peter come home yet?” 

‘Peter arrived at the building five minutes ago and is currently on the rooftop.’ Friday’s voice informed him. 

Tony’s heart dropped. Why was Peter on the rooftop? Tony shot up from the couch and darted to the stairwell, the elevator would take too long. He raced up the stairs, his knees aching in protest. He shoved the door open and heard it smack against the wall. 

Tony's blood went cold as soon as he saw Peter standing on the ledge of the roof, staring down at the world beneath him. He was trembling, tears streaming down his cheeks. His hair blew softly from the wind and Tony feared that would be what would push him over that ledge. 

Tony noticed Peter’s web-shooters discarded on the pebbles. Tony stealthily stepped closer, snatching them up off of the ground and sliding them onto his own wrists. His suits wouldn't be able to get up here without drawing attention and Tony knew Peter was fragile right now, his mind not in the right place. 

Tony continued stepping closer when suddenly Peter’s head lifted from where it was looking down, he turned to look over his shoulder, seeing Tony. Tony froze and held his hands up calmly. 

“Hey, Pete.” Tony tried to steady his shaking voice. 

“You’re dead.” came Peter’s reply, this caused more tears to escape his eyes. Of course, he would be imagining his dead adoptive father as soon as he was about to end his life. He wouldn’t let this hallucination convince him not to. 

“No, I’m not dead, Peter. I’m very alive. And I need you to be too, okay?” Tony called out, his voice hard. Peter turned to face him, his back facing the void behind him. Peter shook his head. 

“You’re just a hallucination.” 

“No, I’m not. Trust me. Just come here and then you’ll see I’m real.” Tony pleaded, stepping closer. He rooted himself to the ground when Peter took a step back, closer to the edge that would lead to his death. 

“I kill anyone who gets close to me! You’re dead because of me.” Peter cried, reaching up to wipe his tears away, only for them to be replaced with new ones. 

“Pete, that’s not true. What happened to your aunt was an accident. A drunk driver hit her. That was  _ not  _ your fault. You’ve done nothing but be a good kid who helps this world be better too. You don’t deserve what shit life throws at you. Bad things happen to good people. You’re a good kid, Pete. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me. You don’t deserve to die.” as Tony spoke, he slowly shuffled closer to Peter. Leaving a five-foot gap between them. 

“I don’t want to. But I have to.” Peter wept. “It will get me if I don’t.” 

“Peter, please come here.” Tony began to cry. He was terrified. He never wanted to see his kid standing on a rooftop ledge again, even as Spider-man. 

“If you are real, I’m sorry.” Peter said with a finality that had Tony lunging forward. Peter let himself step back and drop, only for his wrist to be caught by Tony. Tony was bent over the ledge, holding Peter’s wrist tightly so he wouldn’t slip. 

Peter looked up at Tony from where he dangled. 

“No! Please let me go…” Peter pleaded, kicking his legs. Tony shook his head. “I have to go. Tony, I have to go! Let me go!” Peter sobbed, yanking his wrist in Tony’s grasp. Tony strained, biting his lip. 

“I’m not letting you go, Peter.” Tony told him firmly. 

“Let me go, Tony.” Peter stared up at his mentor with wide watery doe eyes. Tony noticed they didn’t look like Peter’s eyes. They were wild. Tony hated it. When Tony did nothing but hold on tighter, Peter pressed his feet against the building and kicked off of it, his wrist slipping out of Tony’s grasp. 

“PETER!” Tony yelled as he saw Peter plummet toward the concrete ground. Tony shot out his arm and pressed down on the shooter, a web shot out and chased after Peter's falling form. It caught up and wrapped around Peter’s wrist, yanking him to a stop, a scream tore through Peter’s throat as he felt his shoulder dislocate. Tony had no time to feel sorry, he just needed to get his kid safely back on the ground. 

Tony grabbed the web with his other hand and reeled Peter back up to him. Peter tugged at the webbing wrapped around his wrist as he was pulled back up to his mentor. Panic engulfing him. 

Tony pulled Peter back over the ledge and fell to the ground, wrapping his arms around Peter, pinning his arms to his torso. Peter screamed and kicked, crying and pleading that Tony let him go. 

Peter managed to slip from Tony’s arms and darted back toward the ledge. Tony’s gauntlet formed over his hand from his watch and he quickly shot out vibranium cuffs, clamping them around Peter’s ankles. Peter fell onto the pebbles with a grunt, his shoulder flaring up in pain when he held out his arms to catch himself. 

Peter was screaming bloody murder as Tony approached him, the sounds broke Tony’s heart. He knew he would be hearing his screams in his nightmares. Tony approached Peter and knelt next to him. He pulled him to his chest but Peter only tried to push away. Not accepting the embrace like he usually would.

“Friday, get Bruce up here, tell him to bring a sedative.” Tony ordered, talking through his watch. 

‘Right away, boss.’ 

“Tony, pl-please! I need to go, I need to go, I need to-” Peter choked on a sob and Tony let the tears in his eyes escape down his cheeks. What had just happened finally catching up to him. 

Tony knew death was a magnet to Peters out of control body and that no matter what Peter would continue to try to kill himself until whatever drug was out of his system. 

Bruce arrived and approached the delirious teen who was still squirming and fighting to get out of Tony’s hold. His eyes were sad as he jabbed the sedative into Peter’s arm. Peter’s cries slowly became weaker and his eyes fought to stay open. Tony watched sadly as Peter slowly gave into the sedation. 

“What happened, Tones?” Bruce questioned, shocked at seeing Peter in that state. 

“Some bastard is out there drugging teens and making them suicidal and delirious. Peter was one of his victims.” Tony informed him as he scooped up the unconscious teen. Bruce nodded. 

“We should get him to Medbay, wait for him to detox.” Bruce said as they made their way down the stairs. 

“He needs to be restrained until we know for sure the drugs are out of his system.” Tony told him. He hated knowing he would have to keep Peter tied down until he was back to normal. He knew about Peter’s claustrophobia and fear of being pinned down by stuff. But it had to be done.

* * *

Peter had woken up to feel that his wrists were cuffed to the hospital bed with vibranium and straps were secured over his shoulders, legs, forehead, and torso, keeping him completely immobilized. 

The instinct to escape and run had kicked in once he remembered  _ it’s  _ words and Tony and Bruce watched as he screamed and cried. They noticed that he seemed to be in pain this time. 

He had woken up a few times already. He screamed, squirmed, cried, and begged for Tony and Bruce to let him go. But they simply watched as he detoxed from the strong hallucinogenic he was given. 

Bruce had done a few tests after fixing Peter's shoulder and found what he was drugged with. A dangerous hallucinogenic that changes your state of mind completely, instilling fear, paranoia, and active suicidal ideation. 

It would take about a day or three for Peter to detox with his enhanced metabolism and Tony would be there the entire time like he always is. He knew that Peter was somewhat aware in the very back of his mind of everything that was happening based on how Peter seemed to be there for a few seconds before the hallucinogenic took over and shoved his conscience to the back of his mind. He knew Peter was scared. 

So Tony stayed, Peter’s screams and pained cries haunting him. 

* * *

“Tony, Please!” Peter cried, trying to lift his head off of his pillow, unable to with the strap holding it down. “Take them off of me! I can’t- I- I can’t breathe.” Peter wailed. “It hurts!” 

“I’m sorry, Pete. It’ll be over soon.” 

* * *

“It’s here.” 

“What is, buddy?” 

“ _ IT.”  _ Peter trembled, staring off at the corner of the room where he was seemingly seeing something. “It’s watching me.” he whispered. Tony frowned. 

“Nothing’s there, sweetheart.” Tony told him. 

* * *

“I’m okay now.” Peter suddenly spoke up. Tony looked up from where he was looking down at his tablet. 

“Huh?” Tony raised a brow. 

“I said I’m okay now. I won’t run.” Peter repeated, staring at Tony. 

Tony let his eyes lower to see Peter’s sweat covered clothes. His eyes drifted to Peter’s hands which were resting on the bar of his bed, the cuffs holding them in place. They kept opening and closing as if itching to get their hands on something, something dangerous. Tony brought his eyes back up to Peter’s, seeing the crazed look in them, his pupils still blown. He could see that Peter was trying to appear calm, but he was practically vibrating. 

Peter wasn’t back yet.

“Go back to sleep, Pete.” Tony said sadly. 

“I don’t need to. I’m cured.” Peter insisted. Tony stared at him. 

“No, you’re not. You can’t trick me.” Tony scrutinized. 

Peter burst into tears.

* * *

“They caught him?” Peter could hear Tony’s distant voice.

“He’s in SHIELD’s custody.” 

“Good.”

* * *

It was coming up to 3 pm on the third day ever since the incident.

Peter groggily opened his eyes, looking around the dark room. He went to lift his hand to rub his eyes only to be held in place. He looked down to see the restraints. He took a deep steadying breath to calm himself. 

He remembered everything that happened and understood why he was restrained. 

He looked to his right to see Tony curled up in his chair in an uncomfortable position, sleeping. Peter frowned, feeling bad that Tony had spent three days sitting in that uncomfortable chair just for him. 

“Friday, turn the lights up to 30%” Peter spoke softly, his voice gravelly and rough. The lights turned up just enough that he could see the room and Tony’s sleeping face. He stirred from the lights and slowly woke up. 

“Hey, Tony.” Peter spoke gently. Tony looked up at the voice, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. 

“Pete,” he acknowledged.

“I think I’m okay now, I’m not trying to trick you this time.” Peter told him. Tony stared at him, looking him over to see any signs that he still may be under the influence of the hallucinogenic. When he took in Peter’s relaxed body and no longer dilated pupils he relaxed. 

“Hey, Pete.” Tony smiled, pulling his chair closer to the boy. 

“Hey,” Peter smiled back. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to get these things off of me.” Peter  laughed, trying to keep down his panic of not being able to move. Tony seemed hesitant but nodded. He stood up and undid the straps and cuffs. 

Peter sat up and rubbed at his raw wrists where he had tried twisting and pulling them out of the cuffs. Tony watched warily as if Peter would jump up and throw himself out of the closest window. Peter noticed this and reached out, grabbing Tony’s hand in his. 

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m sorry…” Peter apologized, letting his gaze drop to their intertwined hands. 

“It’s not your fault, Pete. I was scared. But I knew I’d catch you.” Tony reassured him.

“Like you always do.” Peter grinned, looking back up at the older man. 

“I always will.” Tony smiled, squeezing his hand. Tony suddenly pulled him into a hug, sighing in relief that it was over. He pressed a kiss to Peter’s curls. 

“I love you, dad.” 

Tony’s breath caught in his throat. 

“I love you too, bambi.” 

**Author's Note:**

> I’m actually very proud of this one, it brought a tear to my eye :’)


End file.
